What Loss Can Teach Us About Living

Someone I care about entered hospice a few days ago, beginning a process that is both dignity-rendering, yet leaking with sadness.

Only our Creator knows the exact time left, but this person would want no pity, and if possible, would be cracking jokes and setting you straight on your attitude and actions at every turn, with declarations that life is to be enjoyed and celebrated.

With that in mind, I issue this Wednesday Wisdom to:

Love on yourself more, just because. 

Tell others what they mean to you while you can (I have and I regularly do).

Cry when you feel like it.

Laugh every chance you get.

Forget about yesterday’s grudges. 

Love those who love you back.

Be kind to those whose rudeness often means they need more kindness.

Challenge yourself to leave everyone better than you found them – with what you say and what you don’t; by how you share and where you set boundaries; and by giving with no expectation of receiving.

Let your heart break. The only way through grief is through. 

Say Thank You for everything – because every breath, every day, and every person who crosses your path is in some way a gift.

Expecting Less, Caring More = Grace

During a leadership event I attended this evening, a new acquaintance informed me about a trauma-relief organization for adults that she leads in the Richmond region called Robin’s Hope.

She and her staff are running 20 groups, 7 days a week, mostly virtual she said, to help people with all kinds of grief, trauma and mental distress.

That level of need blew me away, yet it is very real, across the land.

Nod to UNC-Chapel Hill for acknowledging the mental health crisis unfolding on its campus right now.

Perhaps it’s time we individually take on the charge. I challenge you to look around you, my friend, and be extra kind to those who seem a bit sad, stressed, withdrawn or even overly chipper.

We may not be comfortable yet giving random hugs, but random messages of “Hello” “Have a nice day” “I see you” “I will help you” and “I’m here for you” matter.

Let’s do our best to see each other through this global health pandemic. As you extend more grace to others, also be open to receiving it, because you matter, too.

Let Me Reintroduce Myself

Happy September. I stepped away from most of my online posting during a well-enjoyed August break, and now that I’m back, I say hello to you all and welcome to my new friends and followers. Please indulge me as I take a few minutes to reintroduce myself; and after reading my update, feel free to share a bit about yourself in the comments. I’d love to get to know you and discover what inspires you.  

I’m Stacy. A creative spirit and lover of words. I have a big heart, a feisty streak and a soft spot for all people  – kids and young adults in particular. I’m an optimist who keeps my eyes on life’s prize.

My “It List” includes writing, reading, music, chocolate, fresh flowers, candles, laughter, hugs, sunrises, beaches, mountain views, helping others and learning new things. 

I’m the mom of two young adults who are blazing their trails in the world and allowing me to enjoy their ride. 

I still use all three names though I’m divorced, because “Stacy Hawkins Adams” has been my “pen name” for decades and has taken on a life of its own. Lol ✍🏽😎

Plus, the Adams clan will always be fam and friends. 🥰

So look me up under that name and you’ll find 11 nationally published “book babies” that I hope you’ll consider reading and enjoy. 

I also blog here, at LifeUntapped.com, post inspirational musings on Instagram and on Facebook, and occasionally pen freelance articles and essays for national publications.

I’m in the process of writing a new novel – a piece of women’s fiction that is stretching me and thrilling me (while praying that my agent and a publisher’s gonna love it).

I can be serious, but those closest to me know that I am just as often playful. 

I dance and sing behind closed doors, but I’m a prayer warrior wherever needed. 

I love that my milestone birthday this year has opened me up in ways that are freeing and fulfilling.

I am more often speaking my truth in love

and trusting myself the first time

and believing bigger because, Why not?

I also am still stretching, stumbling and growing; but isn’t that what makes life’s journey a beautiful mosaic? 

I hope the words and images that I routinely share here with you, and on the written page, will remind you that you can do the same.

Stacy Hawkins Adams

Shine, Will You?

I’ve learned over the years that there’s a difference between humility and hiding.

When we hide our gifts, our talents and our offerings that could bless others, because we don’t want to seem “all that,” we’re actually hiding our light under a bushel. Yet, it is the glow from our light that touches others’ souls, and shows them their own path.

When we find the courage to own our positive, unselfish dreams and walk in our purpose, we open a space for everyone around us to do the same, and that is how DESTINY unfolds. 

So today, walk in your light – with grace, gratitude, joy and even some measure of fun! In the process, you’ll change your corner of the world for the better, and the ripple effect will change even more lives.

Today, Just Say Yes

Do something today that reminds you of life’s goodness.

Dance like no one’s watching.

Perform a random act of kindness.

Tell those you care about how much you love them.

Laugh with others and at yourself. 

Spend time embracing what makes you smile.

Say yes to one or two baby steps that move you closer to the vision in your heart. 

Don’t have a vision? Say yes, then, to discovering what one could be, by spending more time with your thoughts and treasuring yourself for being the gem you are. 

As Michelle Obama declares in her Becoming documentary on Netflix, there’s no “going back” to what our lives were yesterday. Our task – and opportunity – is to create a meaningful (and exciting) next chapter that allows us to evolve, impact others and enjoy ourselves along the way. 

In 2020, Be Inspired No Matter What

Happy New Year and welcome to a new decade!

As you settle into this season of new beginnings and fresh promise, I challenge you to not only focus on outward possibilities for growth, but also the inner ones, too.

Take some time in the first few days of 2020 to sit with yourself and ask this important question: What aspects of my life need to be nurtured – right now and in the year ahead?

Whatever your response, I encourage you to embrace it and honor it. And wherever you find yourself during the coming weeks and months, remind yourself of the hope that this dawn of a new year has delivered and “rinse and repeat” the following opportunities to lean into life:

Appreciate each moment.

Nurture yourself.
Celebrate those you love and
Pour new life into your dreams.
Acknowledge life’s realities –
both good and not so good,
Then remember who you are and
Whose you are,
In the midst of it all.
Stand in that truth.
Honor that truth.
Be that truth.
On the days you don’t feel like going on,
Find a way to push through…
To hope,
To love,
To the purpose only you can birth.
Find the courage to
Be Still and
Listen to your heart, and
To words and voices that empower you,
Regardless of what may be shaking the world around you.
Breathe and Be, and
Allow others to do the same.
Trust that good will prevail,
Especially when you offer up your own goodness.
It matters.
Forgive yourself and
Forgive others, too.
Be patient with heartache,
Grant grief some time, and
Trust that wholeness is within your reach.
Seek the Light, and
Be the Light.
This, My Friend, is the Greatest Gift
You can give to yourself,
Which ultimately becomes
Your Greatest Gift to others –
At the beginning of a New Year
And every day in between.
© Stacy Hawkins Adams
lights

Why Taking Risks Is Healthy

Someone recently called me a risk-taker, and at first, I didn’t fully agree. (Most folks are surprised to learn that I can be shy or consider myself an extroverted introvert.)

Then I paused and did a mental rundown of every time I’ve ignored my fears and followed my heart – whether personally, professionally or in daily life – and I had to accept that yes, I’ve been a risk-taker, in ways that have stretched me and yielded phenomenal growth, meaning and joy.

When I look back and consider the pitfalls and valleys along the way, they seem necessary side effects of pursuing and cresting some amazing mountaintops. And as “auntie” Dr. Maya Angelou once so eloquently stated, “I wouldn’t take nothing for my journey.”

So yes, I’m a risk taker in my own unique way, and because of that, I’ve tapped into numerous blessings beyond my comfort zone. God willing, there are more to come.
What about you?

Do you see your dreams and desires on the horizon, just out of reach but fully attainable if you lean in to life or to thinking differently, and leave the safe shore?

Stretch yourself. Create a plan when possible, or simply follow that nudging when it won’t let up. Go for it and don’t look back.

– Stacy Hawkins Adams

 

Dont-worry-about-failures-worry-about-the-chances-you-miss-when-you-dont-even-try-Jack-Canfield 

Set Your Intention & Surrender

I launched this first day of September a week or so ago with a morning trek along a path that was brand new to me. It was beautiful and breezy and serene.

I talked to God, and then I stilled myself to listen, even as my feet kept moving.
Subtly, yet clearly, the answers I sought came.

Then I saw it – that juncture in the road where the paved pathway met gravel – leading to uncultured, unknown territory and to a bend in the road around which I could not see.

I advanced a few feet, then retreated, deciding to explore more fully on another day.

For in that moment, I had all I needed – fresh air, exercise, a lush green setting and a visual reminder that at every turn, I am loved, worthy and deserving of joy.

And guess what? So are you.

That walk reminded me that even when we’re on the right path, we’ll encounter some pebbles, stones, rough patches and dirt. We won’t always know the end before we begin or even when we’re mid-journey. Yet, that’s why it’s so important to enjoy and treasure each step of the journey itself, for all the worth each phase brings.

In the right season, at the appointed time, we will discover the beauty behind those bends and truly value the extra effort it required to get there.

Wherever we are on the path, we can trust God’s goodness despite what the world or our circumstances show, and lean into the truths of how He has already blessed us. Think about your past 90 days and count the ways.

I’m convinced that our trek into the final months of 2019 are gonna be better than good – paved roads, gravelly paths, wood trails and all. Are you ready? I’ve got my walking/running shoes on and I am. 👟🕶💪🏾

Stacy Hawkins Adams

 

How To Treasure What Matters Most

My sister who received a double lung transplant eight years ago taught me that every breath matters.
My friends who’ve lost children have taught me that every hug is priceless.
My mentors and die-hard supporters have taught me the power of no-strings-attached giving and paying it forward.
My own journey has taught me that every kind word and deed, and each memorable experience are gifts not to be taken for granted.
Nor are the so-called simple blessings of waking each day, seeing a sunrise or gazing at a full moon; enjoying some favorite music or reading a good book; trading a smile with a stranger’s baby or kisses with your favorite kids; spending time doing nothing with loved ones or taking self-care journeys solo; learning a tough lesson that leaves you wiser or persisting through a test that proves your dream was worth it.
I’m sure you’ve got your own list of simple and significant blessings. Write them down and reflect on them on those days when nothing seems to be going right. Doing so is a game-changer that can reset your attitude and your trajectory.
It all matters, so appreciate it all.

Stacy Hawkins Adams

68993428_10157517809962359_8013513396345372672_n

Ditch Worry and Dance

This week, don’t waste worry. Show up being your best self. Bring your A game. Trust the process. Enjoy it, too!
Believe you’re worthy, because you absolutely are. Appreciate and celebrate the value others bring.
Know that goodness always triumphs, though it may tarry. Know that you’re a boss, and it starts from the inside out.
Be in it to win it, and do just that.
Stacy Hawkins Adams 

68602741_10157514837062359_5170631043694198784_n

%d bloggers like this: