Got Empathy? How Seeking to Understand Serves Us All

By Stacy Hawkins Adams

“Don’t Make Assumptions.” I appreciate this one of Don Miguel Ruiz’s tenets from his book The Four Agreements in particular because it reminds us to give grace to others due to our own blind spots.

There’s no way we can fully know what someone else is going through or has gone through – especially by watching their social media “commercials.”

There’s no way to know the complete behind-the-scenes experiences that have motivated others’ next steps or perhaps left them stuck – unless we both ask with an open heart (when appropriate) and listen with unfiltered ears (always).
Until we can truly see and value others, we’ll always assume what “should” or “could” be their reality and/or their responses. But what good does this kind of judgment yield?

So consider this agreement a practice worth pursuing, in the spirit of elevating relationships of all kinds.

Ask instead of assuming you know their truths and speak up instead of assuming they “should” know yours.

Pause instead of pointing fingers; reflect instead of rejecting. Know that unless you’ve walked the very path they’re trodding, you really know very little – and vice versa!

Extend grace as you’re also seeking it. Hold at the forefront of your mind that each day and each personal encounter should begin and end the same – with love as the central force.

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How to Make the Rest of This Year the Best of This Year

Can you believe we’re in mid-June and 2018 is half over?
No worries – there’s still enough year left to reboot, regroup and refocus.
Revisit your goals, set new deadlines and get moving.
Practice more self-care, whatever that looks like for you.
Try something new (a meal, a place, an activity) and open your mind to enjoying it.
Say no to whatever feels like settling.
If someone else’s “good enough” is your “almost but not quite,” trust yourself and be patient.
Make new friends, but keep the old.
Forgive yourself, and others too. It’s freeing.
Start positive new habits while gently kissing goodbye those actions, attitudes and encounters that no longer serve you.
Hug yourself. Respect yourself.
Water your soul with loving thoughts and words and watch yourself grow.
Be fair with others, even when they are unkind. Your grace could be the antidote to whatever is causing them to act in unbecoming ways; and if nothing else, you’ll walk in the joy of knowing that you remained your best self.
Be grateful for your allies, supporters and loved ones. People change and tribal members do, too; but your day-in and day-out loyalists are worth cherishing.
Move forward – one thought, one prayer, one choice, one step at a time. This all can add up to a powerful transformation.

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Got Goals? Refocus to Reach Them

Just a month into the New Year have you abandoned your goals or exceeded them?

Have you given up halfway there or talked yourself out of even trying? During this final week of January, take some time to recalibrate and refocus.
Stand up and start again.

Create your own brief list of tasks – not necessarily for what you want to DO this week, but for who you want to BE because of what you do. 

List your WHY as well as your HOW.

Say WHEN as well as WHAT.

Look yourself in the eye (in the mirror) and ask yourself, “Why not me?” Then go for it, with all you’ve got.

When you firmly choose the path you want to walk, your dreams and desires will manifest along the way.

~ Stacy Hawkins Adams

Channeling Joy

Today I’m channeling the former queen of daytime TV…
You get some joy, she gets some joy, he gets some joy, we ALL get some joy!
There’s enough to go around and it’s not one-size-fits-all or first come, first served.
Look within and listen. Start living your soul’s dream. You’ll see – your joy will flow.                 

                  ~ Stacy Hawkins Adams

For Little Girls and Boys Everywhere…

Happy Monday. I missed Oprah Winfrey’s speech when she delivered it live last night on the Golden Globe Awards, but it is just as moving on video.
Take a few minutes to click here and watch her inspire little girls with big dreams who are somewhere in the world watching her shine, and be assured…
there are little girls and little boys watching you and me, too. Let’s not let them down.

Why Your Next-Level Thinking Must Begin Today

Are you ready for your next level?

You don’t have to have it all together before you start (no one does),

Or know exactly how it all will unfold (life happens),

Or be without flaw (curveballs and mistakes are par for the course).

What you DO need is a belief in your vision and a belief that you’re worth the self-investment, because you are.

So go after your personal goals with faith and focus,

And recalibrate your professional ones with strategic creativity and heart.

Your tenacity, passion and purpose will inspire others to embrace their best life, too.

Don’t wait until 2018…start now.

Why New Beginnings Matter

Here we are in September – the launching month for fall and the last quarter of 2017. What will you do with this new beginning?
It’s never too late to learn something new, strengthen a weakness and be a better you.
Don’t be defined by a past that’s now just a distant memory. Write a few new pages in your story that will make your journey all the more worth remembering. Someday you’ll be grateful you did.

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