Keep Beginning Again

“Working keeps my mind sharp and my body agile”

By Guest Blogger Wanda S. Lloyd

“My mom doesn’t know how to retire.”

Those are the words of my millennial daughter, Shelby, who frequently tells people that her Baby Boomer generation mother is in her third career. 

Perhaps we Boomers took a lesson from actress Betty White, who once said: ““Retirement is not in my vocabulary. They aren’t going to get rid of me that way.” White lived up to her own prediction by performing well into her 90s.

Like many in my generation, after officially “retiring” in 2013 as an editor in seven daily newspaper newsrooms, I kept working. I became a professor, an author, an essayist and opinion writer, podcaster and a community volunteer.

Working long and hard was ingrained in the professional corps of my generation. And now, Based on a recent survey, it seems like the work-until-forever trend may be the case with the Gen Z generation, those who are behind the Baby Boomers – albeit for a different reason. 

In April 2024, AARP reported that 20% of adults ages 50+ have no retirement savings, and more than half (61%) are worried they will not have enough money to support themselves in retirement. 

The parents of my Boomer generation worked for what now seem like unreasonably small wages, yet they were able to sustain households. The elders in my family, those whose health allowed them to live long enough to enjoy the fruits of their labor, used their relatively comfortable pensions and meager Social Security checks to enjoy hobbies, church activities and time with family. My elders didn’t seem to covet working after retirement. 

Not me. Now in my mid-70s, I believe working keeps my mind sharp and my body agile. After I left my first career, I didn’t look forward to hobbies, and after decades of work-related travel I had little thirst for long vacations. My years as a newsroom leader were full of exciting challenges — hiring great staff, developing talent, the demands of breaking news and daily deadlines. 

No day was like the day before. That’s the pace I kept, yet I knew it would be difficult to totally pump the brakes just because I was no longer working in newsrooms. I knew it was time to redefine myself professionally.

These days I encounter quite a few other retirees who have transitioned from one hard-working career to the next, some of them still earning money and some simply enjoying the satisfaction of volunteering. 

After departing my last newsroom, the Montgomery Advertiser in Alabama, I stepped into the role as a university department chair and professor, landing back in the coastal Georgia hometown that I departed 45 years before. Then a few years later I decided to step away from academia, and I began my non-fiction writing career, which included two books published in 2020, followed by  a COVID-inspired virtual book tour. These days I am a lecturer and moderator on  topics of great interest to me. And I continue to  mentor the next generation of journalists and aspiring authors. 

For those who may be approaching retirement and wondering how to adapt to the next chapter of life, here are some insights from my experience.

  • Give yourself time to figure out the next step. When you officially “retire” you may first be overwhelmed with calls for opportunities to volunteer, lead projects, join boards or get involved with someone else’s projects. Take some time to rest, clean out your closets or plant a garden – whatever gives you pleasure as you ponder your next chapter.
  • Dress for a different kind of success. Speaking of cleaning closets, one of the things I discovered is that I had way too many professional clothes and not enough casual stuff. Grocery shopping in the middle of the day dressed in business casual attire was not cool. My advice: set aside a small budget for more casual stuff; find a consignment store or donate much of your professional wardrobe. Hard-working, cash-strapped GenX or millennial workers may appreciate the value of your recycled items. 
  • Go for long walks (especially if you have a dog). I discovered that walks with my Bella are therapeutic and a great opportunity to meet neighbors, enjoy the changing seasons and think about life’s next steps. And, I found that some of my best writing ideas come to me while walking.
  • Find a new community. If you are antsy to get out of the house and enjoy social events, check out neighborhood websites or social media to see what’s going on around you. In my community, I joined The Learning Center, where members enjoy lectures and programs that enhance our knowledge of our community, the humanities and culture in the company of other active senior citizens. Many new friendships have been developed at the center.
  • Maintain career connections. Stay in touch with former  career colleagues, especially those who are also retired or retiring soon. And make yourself available to mentor young people who aspire to grow in your career field. Young people need the wisdom of our experiences.

One lesson I learned about retirement was from TV personality Fred Rogers, who recorded “Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood” until he was 72 years old. He said this about working life: “Often when you think you’re at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.”

Embrace that as you look for your own next beginning.

Photo credit: Jamie Weaver

Wanda Lloyd, an editor who worked at The Washington Post, USA Today and five other daily newspapers, is the author of COMING FULL CIRCLE: From Jim Crow to Journalism, and she is co-editor of MEETING AT THE TABLE: African-American Women Write on Race, Culture and Community.

How My Other Passion Reinforces the Power of One

One of my intentions this year is to bring my whole self to every role I embody, because all of Stacy shows up as the fiction writer, the nonfiction inspirational writer, the strategic communications professional, the mom, sister, auntie, friend and community volunteer.

With that in mind, while I will primarily continue to post in this space about my inspirational musings, my novel-in-progress and other author-related news, I’ll also be sharing occasionally about another endeavor that’s close to my heart: an opportunity to advocate for children and foster communications for a greater good.

I’m excited to share that I have joined the global nonprofit organization Children International (aka CI) as the Global Director of External Communications.

(To those who’ve inquired, yes – I’ll still be based in and involved in the Richmond, Virginia community, and I will continue my creative writing and occasional writer coaching.)

Here’s to those of us who are multi-passionate! Writing remains my foundation, and I’m grateful for this and other opportunities to evolve, grow and experience where it leads.

Traveling to Colombia with Colleagues

My most recent adventure led me to Colombia. It is one of 10 countries (including the U.S.), where Children International is serving youths and young adults who exist in dire poverty and need hope to believe their lives can get better, along with tangible help to make it so. Eight colleagues and I traveled there from the U.S. in mid-February, to meet with some of those we serve and with our Colombian counterparts who are leading operations.

Since words won’t suffice, I hope the few images I’ve shared here (plus more you can find on my Facebook page), convey in some small way, the mutual joy felt by all of us to connect as members of the CI family.

These young people repeatedly offered thanks for consistent educational support, access to health care, life skills exposure, and positive role models who pour into them, when the lure of gangs, giving up on life, and other ills threaten to pull them off track.

They expressed how much it has meant to exchange letters with people who have sponsored them with monthly contributions since ages 3, 4 or 5.

They described how the opportunity to receive Children International scholarships that fund job training has allowed them to dream.

Before we departed, one of the teenagers thanked us for our work by declaring: “You are a grain of sand that helps us have better lives.”

I left their presence knowing they are more than their circumstances. They are eager to learn, grow and be the first generation to help their families thrive.

On one of our final nights dining together as a team, a Colombian CI colleague took us to La Cueva, a restaurant famous for serving as home base for the city of Barranquilla’s renowned journalists, authors and artists. Unbeknownst to her, one of the waiters for the night — a 20-something aspiring writer — had once been a sponsored child through Children International. When he saw the organization’s name on our group reservation, he proudly introduced himself as an alum.

Seeing him working in an esteemed establishment while continuing school and nurturing his creative goals made our collective day. It was a welcome reminder that our choices to go the distance with others can give them breathing space to find their way.

I left Colombia all the more convinced that it takes just one person to impact a life. By changing the narrative for one, we are rewriting the story for many.

To learn more about Children International, visit children.org.

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Be good to yourself

I’ve been on a staycation this week and just a few days in, I feel like a new woman.

I’ve cleaned my fridge, and filled bags of clothes and other stuff to take to Goodwill and to a local church’s clothes closet.

I’ve hooked up a new computer (on my own), although my son chatted with me during the process, in case I needed tech support. Lol

I’ve fielded calls from my daughter, the bride-to-be, who is on the countdown to April.

I’ve chatted with a few friends daily and lunched with two.

I’ve turned down a brief road trip and a complimentary flight. Why?? To simply rest.

Which leads me to what has been the most meaningful part of this week so far:  allowing myself to sleep until my heart’s content and move at a “whenever I get to it” pace. (Today is my busy day for the week. I’ve scheduled a few appointments and virtual meetings, and if I owe you an email, it’s coming!)

My fellow author Saundra Dalton Smith, who penned the bestselling book Sacred Rest, would be proud.

Because rest is indeed sacred, and it opens up our well and our energy for creativity, deeper engagement with others, better appreciation for our blessed surroundings, and greater willingness to see and serve ourselves. (When our wells are full; we can healthily pour into others.) 

I haven’t paused this week because I’m ill(I feel great!); I’ve intentionally paused to ensure that my pace for 2024 remains measured and meaningful. 

I’ve paused to ensure that I center myself in being fully present and focused on enjoying the days, weeks and months to come.

This “rule of rest” for the week felt uncomfortable at first (those waiting-but-not-urgent emails and chapters to write taunted me), but as I’ve leaned into the leisure, I’m certain it’s preparing me to dive more joyfully and energetically into my storytelling projects and other professional endeavors, my volunteer activities, family milestone moments, looming travel, and much more. 

I’ve shared this, in part, as an invitation to join me. If your January was busier than expected, consider making time in February for your own sacred pause.

You may not be able to devote a week, but gift yourself a day (or a few) to lean into sleep – as much as your body craves – and enjoy some good food, laughter, and pampering yourself in simple ways that matter to you.

You are worth it. And so are the dreams, goals, work, relationships and legacy you are nurturing. Trust the timing of your life, and in the process, your preparation and strategic rest, will align. 

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Keep Seeking Joy

I recently came across a photo of myself that was taken during my senior year of college and I’ve kept it on my nightstand for an occasional chuckle. 

Yes, my pants are too big ( I was really petite back then and did my best! 😂) and yes, I remember where I was – in a friend’s dorm room, enjoying a surprise party thrown for me. 

I look like I’m singing because I was. But can I really sing? Sadly not. I had fun trying, though, with whatever song was playing at the time.

I look like I was acting silly because I was. And guess what? 

Beneath my sometimes reserved, often inspirational and occasionally feisty demeanor lies a woman who is still fun at heart and able to laugh at myself and with others.

I was 21 in this pic and considered grown.

What I’d tell that young girl from my now full-fledged adult state is actually what I exemplify in this photo: to always find joy in the small moments and sing (and dance) through the rest. 

That girl didn’t always get it right and neither do I; but both versions of me have been, and remain, grateful for love, laughter, grace, life lessons and the journey itself – gifts that never age or go out of style. 

This week, I challenge you to dig up a few of your own funny pics from the past and reflect on your treasured (or silly) moments from yesterday. May you be inspired to embrace new dreams, cut yourself and others some slack, and create more meaningful memories.

Stacy during her senior year of college.

Embracing My Year of Firsts — And Inviting You Into Yours

By Guest Blogger Lynn Lewis

As we settle into a new year, it’s a great time to reflect on the good of the year that has passed and assess how we have grown or blossomed. With this in mind, I invite you to spend a few moments with me, reflecting on some of the adventures, laughter, and unexpected twists that made my 2023 an extraordinary year of firsts. My journey unfolded with intention, leading to experiences that filled my heart with joy and my soul with a sense of discovery. As you read about my special firsts, consider what brought you hope last year and which of those pluses you may want to incorporate into your future.

I Signed Up for Laughter Yoga.

The journey began with laughter—pure, unbridled, snorting laughter in the form of Laughter Yoga at The Innerwork Center in Richmond, Virginia. Imagine this: a group of four, a cozy yoga studio, and the fusion of laughter and focused movement. We warmed up with simple exercises, gradually easing into a session of laughter charades that left us in stitches. It was silly, it was rewarding, and it set the tone for many more adventures to be had. The power of laughter, combined with the serenity of yoga, created an experience that reached beyond what I could have ever imagined.

I surrendered to an impromptu adventure.

Life has a way of lobbing surprises, as was evident on a planned day trip from Richmond to New York City, to experience Tea Around Town on a converted double-decker bus turned elegant tea room. The flight that my friends and I were scheduled to take was canceled minutes before boarding time. Now what? Pivot. After an impromptu photo shoot in the airport, we shifted our plans westward — to Charlottesville, Virginia.

Blog post author Lynn Lewis is center, wearing hat.

This detour led us to Pippin Hill Farm & Vineyard, a picturesque winery nestled in the heart of Virginia. The day unfolded with a decadent lunch, a perfect blend of nature, good company, and the delightful exploration of local treasures in downtown Charlottesville.  It was a subtle and welcoming reminder that sometimes, the unplanned detours lead to the most memorable adventures.

I enjoyed a Girls’ Weekend that Turned Out to Be a Lesson in Perfect Timing.

How often do we find ourselves waiting for the “right time” to do something we’ve always wanted to do? For me, it was hosting a few of my closest friends for Girls’ Weekend 2023. Some of them knew of each other, but they had never met in person.  I had wanted to make that happen for longer than I can remember.  The realization struck—what was I waiting for? The right time was now. No lavish resort, just my humble abode, transformed into a haven of laughter, stories and indelible shared moments.  Five of the seven invitees showed up, and what unfolded was a perfect blend of friendship, games and heartfelt conversations. Sometimes the most meaningful experiences happen in the comfort of our own spaces.

Now It’s Your Turn — Here’s Your Invitation to Intentional Living!

What have you been putting off? What dreams and adventures have you deferred for the elusive “right time?”  What is it that you’ve been yearning to do?  As I reflect on my year of firsts, I encourage you to embrace the unknown and step into the uncharted territories of your desires. Seek out new experiences, savor the joy of the unexpected, and create a tapestry of memories that can help define your journey.

The joy I found in my new experiences has led me to a decision—to make a lifestyle of enjoying firsts. Share your stories, your dreams and your moments of joy. Let’s inspire each other to embrace a life filled with firsts and make 2024 a year of intentional living, where every day brings new opportunities for joy, growth and connection. Here’s to the adventures that await and the stories yet to be written.

Lynn Lewis is a Virginia-based grief coach, survivor of suicide loss, speaker and author. Learn more about her services at DestinedToThriveGriefCoaching.com and follow her on Instagram at @griefcoachlynn.

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Final Friday in 2023…Why This Is Our Time

TGIF! On this final Friday in 2023, I give thanks for a year that has been full of so many moments of wonder, wow God, self-reflection, self-love, acceptance of others, joy, tears, surrender and soaring. 

In the words of the great Maya Angelou, I “wouldn’t take nothing for my journey!

I am grateful for what has been and I’m excited about what’s to come. 

Oooh the stories I am stirring to share (in writing and otherwise)! Stay tuned. 😊

What have been your moments of wonder, wow God, self-reflection, self-love, acceptance of others, joy, tears, surrender and soaring?

Join me in reflecting and giving thanks.

Celebrate what has been and welcome new horizons.

This is our time. 

May we all elevate our visions, throw our shoulders back, and greet the purpose and opportunities before us with open arms, a can-do attitude, and a smile. 

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Grieving During the Holidays

Let’s talk about grief.

I posted the message below eight years ago today, right after my sister Pat’s passing.

As I head into my late mother’s birthday tomorrow, and the 1st anniversary of my brother’s Dec. 20 passing,

and hold in my heart friends and loved ones who are grappling with loss during the holidays, I find it important to share these words again-

to remind you that grief is a necessary part of life and to love yourself through it.

Please read on, then doing something kind for yourself today.

I’m completing some writing projects this morning,

getting a massage this afternoon, and

spending time with friends this evening.

Sending a virtual hug to all who need it and encouraging you to cherish good memories.

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Here’s Why You’re a Super Hero, Too

I wasn’t planning to share this on social, because it was such a special moment between my son and me.

However, in the past few weeks I’ve had conversations with several other moms who are in the trenches of parenting, and chatting with them reminded me that sometimes when you’re in the middle of a thing, you can’t envision the difference your commitment is making.

These conversations also reminded me that when I was raising young children and then adolescents, there were moms ahead of me on the journey who encouraged me to keep pouring and loving and correcting and guiding, and to trust that the seeds being planted and the care being rendered were a worthy investment.

It is with this in mind (and with his permission) that I share this sweet note that my 22-year-old son surprised me with back in August, upon finding an old English paper amid his belongings before he returned to college for senior year.

It reads “You are my super hero!” and the note explains that he had described me as such in a paper written during his sophomore year.

In the paper, he explored how super heroes often steal away to transform into their “super selves” and change the world for the better. In my case, he indicated that my super power was writing.

He detailed how, as a young child, he often watched me focus on completing my manuscripts on some weekends and some evenings, and rather feeling resentful, witnessing me fulfill a dream that would give hope and enjoyment to others made him proud.

What a gift that note and the recently found essay were to my mama soul!

And what a powerful reminder that our babies are watching us, and in doing so, learning how to write their own super hero stories.

So, to my friends who are in the hands-on stages of parenting: Don’t let weariness cause you to give up or despair. Trust that just as your efforts to nurture your children and guide their dreams is a gift to them, so is your persistence in leaning into your own heart songs and life’s calling.

You are their super hero, and someday I’m confident that in their own ways, they’ll tell you.

Share with Your Friends!

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How Creating creates Joy

I’ve been exercising my creative juices for the past month on a small, but special project that I’m excited to share with you soon.

What I’ve loved as much as the process of refining the words and getting the aesthetics just right (with a gifted artistic partner) are the friends and fam who have offered feedback and edits, burned the midnight oil with me to ensure that I create in excellence, and reminded me that as “Ms. #LifeUntapped” not only CAN I think and move outside the creative box of titles and genres, I betta!

This is what rising together takes.

Iron sharpens iron.

Vision multiplies vision.

Shoulders lower so you can climb aboard.

What matters most is the art itself.

There’s a tired-but-happy place feeling that centers you as you’re producing it, and eventually the joy that comes with hearing readers express renewed hope or joy or value after experiencing your words. 🙏🏾

More to come on this project in early October. In the meantime, thank you to my tribe! When it’s your turn, the rising, sharpening, encouragement and lowered-shoulder moments will come full circle.

Why Reading Matters

During my childhood summers in Arkansas, my older sister Sandra would take my nieces and me to the public library every two weeks to check out books, and I would excitedly borrow as many as possible and finish them all before the next visit.

Books stretched my imagination and took me around the world back then, and for many years I’ve supported adult and youth literacy programs in Richmond and nationwide. (Shoutout to The Read Center and to Reach Out and Read.)

Yet, it felt like a full circle moment this past summer to help champion reading on the other side of the globe with a likeminded tribe of friends.

Thank you to my journalist friend Shelby Brown with WTVR CBS 6 for sharing my experience in Kenya with viewers on #NationalReadABookDay.