One Mother’s Journey: Pacing vs. Racing – Taking Time to be Kind to Yourself

By Guest Blogger C.A. Morgan

Fame isn’t my forte. But neither is obscurity.

What am I good at? Well…

As an artist, author, vocalist and Top Chef wannabe, I am quite the Renaissance woman, not to tweet my own tune. My friends will tell you: I do it all. (Thanks, friends!) But ask my family a few years back and they’d claim I was best at being Mean & Ornery & Hard to Get Along With. MOHGAW for short.

I can’t help it; it’s in my blood.

I never wanted to emulate my mother, though she is pretty sweet these days. As a stay-at-home mom of nine children who gave up her dream of becoming a nurse, Mom made MOHGAW her motto. I craved a family, but also to develop and share my own gifts with the world. Anything less seemed like a cop-out.

Once a bright-eyed collegiate turned ambitious young adult, I planned to become the next C.S. Lewis/Beatrix Potter combined. I moved east with great expectations and – blink! – somehow found myself married with four young children, struggling to not disappear under piles of dirty dishes and laundry.

While I love my kids, parenting well is demanding work. I began to understand – and resemble – my mom as I despaired ever achieving my career goals. Oh, the mom-guilt! Why couldn’t being the best possible homemaker satisfy my needs? Why must I want it all?

Still…I did, and it showed.

Deciding I could no longer wait for the perfect circumstances (there is no such thing), with our two oldest in school and portfolio, toddler and swaddled infant in hand, I met with a local author who generously agreed to mentor me. For the next several years, while trying to keep family my priority, I wrote and scrupulously edited the first book of my YA fantasy trilogy. To contribute financially, I went to work part-time teaching music at my children’s school. (How better to share that gift than by passing it on to the next generation?)

I created and donated art for charity, and kept up an illustrated parenting blog to encourage other moms while providing self-therapy. Life was fulfilling, exhausting…and totally unsustainable as we welcomed our bonus baby.

MOHGAW Momster reawakened.

Thankfully, and long before Oprah Winfrey put the sentiment into words, I had an epiphany: It really is possible to have it all, just not all at once. I was cheating everyone by trying. Pace myself and I might actually enjoy the life I already had, while creating the one I dreamed of.

Granting that permission to slow down was the kindest thing I’ve ever done – for myself and everyone around me. Skip ahead: Thirteen years since penning that first novel – the year after my firstborn graduated high school – it was published. Two more children left for college, and I gave birth to two more volumes. More are coming, all in good time.

And I’m not so MOHGAW anymore. Just ask my family.

Author C.A. Morgan

C.A. Morgan, author of Emrysia: The Three Sisters Trilogy (Emrysia Awakening, Lament & Endurance) is a lifelong learner and champion dream chaser who loves to encourage others to contribute what only they may to the world. From northern Michigan to remote mountainside in Vermont’s northeast kingdom, she is equally at home on stage or in her garden, and is currently sharing the gift of music in a hospice choir, and completing illustrations for her children’s book on the fears associated with diagnostic testing. She and husband, Roger, are enjoying a quieter house these days, raising their belated blessing with occasional unsolicited advice from her adult siblings. To learn more visit her online at: www.camorganwrites.com, facebook.com/reademrysia, and twitter@camorganwrites.

Video Viewpoint: How Storytelling Helps You Grow

Whether personally or professionally, may this brief video inspire you to write a vision, life strategy, book, blog post, journal entry or essay about your experiences and set a new resolve to thrive.

 

Why I Love: Librarians

Throughout this week I’ve read quite a few posts on my various social media feeds about exciting national librarian conferences and about funding issues related to school librarians.

The conversations and concerns reminded me of Mrs. Horn, the sweet, silver-haired librarian at Sam Taylor Elementary School in my native Arkansas.

When she discovered my voracious appetite for reading and saw me zip through books in record time, she took this shy 2nd grader under her wing and not only helped me discover chapter books and excellent authors, but also challenged me to read books that stretched my imagination.


I didn’t get all of the nuances of the novel “Heidi” as a 7-year-old, but that didn’t really matter. What mattered was that Mrs.Horn thought I should try; and as a result, I’ve been nudging myself ever since to try new things, to push past my comfort zone, to be willing to make sense of experiences different from my own, while celebrating and valuing my own.


These days, I try my best to write from that place, too. (One of my first attempts was in 4th grade, when my teacher, Mrs. Owens, let me write our class play, which my classmates willingly performed.)

Thank you, Mrs. Horn (and Mrs. Owens) for being among my many elementary school champions. Your efforts helped shape my memories and my foundation.

What about you? On whose shoulders do you stand? What simple acts of kindness or unsung gestures helped shaped you for good?

Take a few minutes to reflect on this, then if possible, find those heroes or “sheroes” and say thanks. Regardless of whether you reconnect with them, you can honor them by paying forward their generosity of spirit.
~ Stacy Hawkins Adams

CCO Use

Chat with the Author: Combining Cultural Lore with Faith & Love is Her Heartsong

Meet Unoma Nwankwor, the bestselling author of seven Christian romance fiction titles. Her readers are in love with her unique way of telling stories that capture the essence of her present home base  – Atlanta, Georgia – and her native Nigerian culture. Her stories  center on forgiveness, faith and hope, and have been described as the perfect fusion of those elements, combined with just enough romance and African spice to keep readers turning pages.
What are the titles of your most recent books? My most recent title is Mended with Love (released October 2017). It is the third book in my Sons of Ishmael Series. Another recent release is The Final Ultimatum (October 2016), and it is the long-awaited stand-alone sequel to my 2013 novella The Christmas Ultimatum.
What is your primary goal as an author? My goal is to entertain and edify, while educating my readers about the continent of Africa – especially my home country of Nigeria. The media shows what they want to about the continent; so being that I love my Jesus, a good happily ever after, and my home, all three are always prominent in my books. After reading one of my books, I want my readers’ appetite whet for Jesus. I want them to have had a good time and to know something about Africa they didn’t know before. Or correct something they thought they knew.
What has been the most surprising feedback you’ve received from readers about your work? In The Final Ultimatum, the main characters are from Nigeria and South Africa. When I started to write the novel, I decided to incorporate a hot issue currently causing a rift between the two countries: xenophobia [which is the intense or irrational fear of people from other countries]. My readers didn’t see that coming. They were intrigued by the issue, but also marveled at how I didn’t allow the heaviness of the topic overshadow the couple’s story.
What has been the most surprising aspect of your author journey? I wouldn’t call it surprising; humbling would be the word I’d use. That moment for me would be [realizing] the acceptance of my American audience. I initially let the fear of no one caring about what I wrote or what I had to say  stop me. However, I [eventually decided] that I couldn’t write anything other than the stories I had in me to tell. Since that time, in 2012, not writing has no longer been an option. I went with what I know. So the acceptance of something different by readers humbles me daily.
How do you  nurture your growth as a writer? I read at least one craft book every quarter. I also have a broad variety of genres I read.
Who are two or three writers you admire or consider mentors? I admire and consider [bestselling Christian fiction author] Pat Simmons a mentor. There are a host of others I admire, too numerous to mention.
If you weren’t an author, what else would you be doing? I’m also passionate about helping “Christianprenuers”  move past the stagnation of uncertainty while on their purpose journey. Sometimes we get stuck or weary when the dark seasons arise. I enjoy encouraging others to push through their process while glowing in the dark.
What do you like to do for fun?  Go to movies with my family.
More about Unoma Nwankwor: Unoma Nwankwor is the author of seven fiction titles. Her work fuses faith, romance and African culture. In 2015, she was the recipient of the Nigerian Writers’ Award for Best Faith-Based Fiction Writer. In late 2016, she was shortlisted for the Diaspora Writer of the Year award for 2017. Unoma holds a B.S. degree in banking & finance and a mastimageer’s degree in global management. She is a champion of purpose, passionate about pushing women Christianprenuers past the stagnation of uncertainty by building confident expectations in the promises of God. Unoma was also recently named as one of the “100 Most Influential Nigerian Writers Under 40”  and is also the host of the Anchor Talk Podcast. Visit her at www.unomanwankwor.com or on Facebook at facebook.com/UnomaNwankwor or on Twitter and Instagram via the handle @unwankwor.

We are Watercolored Pearls – In Honor of #NationalPoetryDay

I’m not a poet, but every now and then I dabble. Since today is National Poetry Day I’ll share a piece I wrote in 2014, to reveal at a brunch I hosted to celebrate the power of women’s stories – women like you and me.
Read on, and be inspired…

Writing from and for the Journey

By Stacy Hawkins Adams

I haven’t turned on my creative fiction juices in a while, because although I absolutely love manufacturing interesting characters and breathing life into them, I also have a deep love for nonfiction writing. Over the past year or so, I’ve focused my attention there.

I recently entered my 10th year of penning a parenting column for a daily newspaper in Richmond, Virginia; I launched this inspirational blog a few moths ago, and I occasionally write commentary for the Huffington Post.

Beyond those outlets, my “day job” of serving as Director of Communications for a private school in my community affords me an opportunity to do all kinds of writing – from marketing and advertising copy to social media posts to letters and other messaging that share the “how” and “why” of this school and its mission to produce service-minded leaders who make a difference locally and around the globe. All of this excites me.

And yet….the ideas for a new novel still rise to the surface every now and then, teasing me to consider what my 11th book could and should be. I’m not sure yet when that one will be birthed, but I already have a list of character names, a few potential plot ideas and even a tentative title.

I’m not ready to start writing the first draft because the ideas are still “baking.” I’ll know when the plot is just firm enough to put pen to paper, and then move those handwritten notes to my computer.

In the meantime, I’m doing my writer’s “homework”: Leaning into the gifts and opportunities that come with daily life, enjoying special moments with family and friends, overhearing compelling conversations or intriguing names that might make their way into my story, and taking in the scenery, sights and sounds around me, so that when I need these things most, they are a finger tap away in the notes section of my iPhone, or stored in my mental image bank.

I recently had the pleasure of joining an award-winning children’s author for dinner, and during our conversation, Newberry Medal winner Rita Williams-Garcia announced that she no longer writes under deadline. When the manuscript is ready – however long that may take – she intuitively knows, and she only writes The End at that point.

While many of us scribes may not have that luxury – or be disciplined enough to know the difference between being stuck and accepting that the project is substantive enough to move forward – learning about her method left me thinking that more of us should find the courage (or be extended opportunities) to give our words, ideas and stories the space to grow and mushroom into something fantastically wonderful.

If and when you can, I encourage my fellow writers to let your story marinate; let the words come on their own; let the characters show you who they are in their own time.

Because I’m not on deadline or under contract with a publisher at the moment, this is exactly what I’m doing. I’m also reading some great fiction, and books about the art of writing, along the way.

It’s an unsettling experience in some ways – especially when my readers say they’re ready for another book-  and I hate to keep readers waiting. Yet, in another way, it’s freeing, because I’m allowing the writer journey to unfold before me.

I’m confident that when my new characters are ready to meet the world, they’ll let me know. When they start nudging, I won’t be able to get them out of my head unless I tell their stories! Lol

Until then, I hope you’ll continue reading my current novels, the few fictional short stories I’ll be penning soon, and also my body of nonfiction writing. The mission of all of my work is to enlighten, uplift and inspire. I hope my fictional characters and my intriguing true-to-life subjects do just that for you.

Note: This essay was originally published on the Black Christian Reads blog, in July 2017.

Chat with the Author: Transporting Readers to New Worlds Is Her Goal

Meet beloved New York Times bestselling author Adriana Trigiani – a writer who has regaled millions of readers with her engaging stories of strong (and often hilarious) women – who I consider a friend and mentor.

Adriana’s 17th book will be released later this month, on June 20. Enjoy her Q&A with LifeUntapped, in which she details her author journey and shares about her books and characters.

In what genre do you write?  I write fiction – big, noisy, lush novels about love, work and family. I’ve also written a non-fiction memoir, young adult novels, screenplays, teleplays and plays for the theater.  I consider myself a dramatist, first and foremost, as the characters and the worlds they inhabit are alive to me, and hopefully to you the reader.

What is the title of your most recent book? Kiss Carlo [Scheduled for release on June 20, this novel has been described as “a delightfully sprawling comedy full of extended families, in all their cocooning warmth and suffocating expectations” by Kirkus Reviews.]

What is your primary goal as an author – What do you want your readers to gain from of your books?  I hope my reader is transported to another place and time, where she takes her mind off her work, challenges and troubles and has a few laughs, connects to characters she can relate to, and finds some beauty and truth in the language.

What has been the most surprising feedback you’ve received from readers about your current book or another recent title?  Some of my readers thought All the Stars in the Heavens, about the golden age of Hollywood, was a biography. It was not. It was historical fiction.

What has been the most surprising aspect of your author journey?  I am always surprised at how energized I become in the company of my readers. They are my focus and the ultimate joy of writing anything. It’s their connection to the work that connects me to the work, too. That has been wonderful, and I didn’t anticipate it!

How do you continue growing as a writer?

 The only way to grow is to put in the time.  It’s hours in the chair- after hours of ruminating, gestating and thinking. It’s a funny job.  It doesn’t look like a writer is doing anything, when in fact, she is building a world.

Who are two or three writers you admire or consider mentors?  Ruth Goetz trained me as a dramatist when I moved to New York City. Prior to that, my mother, a librarian was and is my first and best teacher. She taught me to revere books, knowledge and the sacred act of reading.  My teachers were fundamental in my development as a writer; Sister Theresa Kelly, Thelma Carter, Grace White, Elizabeth Callahan, Langley Flannary, Grace Skeens, Basil Walker, Dorothy Carter, Arline Sharpe, Iva Braly, Gary Willams, Greg Cantrell, Sigrid Holloman, Frances Lewis, Bernis Zander, Theresa Bledsoe, well, I could keep going, and forgive me, the long list would overwhelm your site!  And, of course, my librarians, James Varner on the county bookmobile; Ernestine Roller at Big Stone Gap Elementary and the great Billie Jean Scott at Powell Valley High School.  All were essential and beloved.

What else are you passionate about, i.e. if you weren’t an author, what else would you be doing?  I’d be an interior designer.

What do you like to do for fun?  Get ready for this one…. R E A D!

More About Adriana Trigiani: Adriana Trigiani is the New York Times bestselling author of 17 books in fiction and nonfiction. She is published in 35 countries around the world. Adriana is also a playwright, television writer/producer and filmmaker, and received accolades for the documentary film, Queens of the Big Time. She wrote and directed the major motion picture Big Stone Gap, filmed entirely on location in her Virginia hometown. The movie spent 11 weeks in theaters in the fall of 2015 and was the #2 top-grossing romantic comedy of the year. Adriana co-founded The Origin Project with Nancy Bolmeier Fisher, an in-school writing program which serves over a thousand students in the Appalachian mountains of Virginia. She lives in New York City with her family and their rescue pets. Adriana speaks to book clubs and classrooms regularly. To invite her and schedule a Skype, please reach out to her at adrianaasst@aol.com, join her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or visit her at her website: adrianatrigiani.com. Adriana’s new novel, Kiss Carlo, is available for pre-sale online and wherever books are sold.